Stephen Colbert Agrees With Mitch McConnell

Lifestyle


“The rising instances are being fueled by vaccine hesitancy, which itself is being fueled by a harmful pathogen scientists are calling the Republican Social gathering.” — STEPHEN COLBERT

Consultant Steve Scalise, Republican of Louisiana, additionally inspired skeptics to get the pictures after receiving his first dose this week, saying, “I’ve been vaccinated, a lot of my colleagues have been vaccinated, and the vaccine is protected, efficient, and it’s extensively out there.”

“Yeah, Steve, we all know. All of us acquired it months in the past.” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“Steve Scalise is just like the man who simply now came upon about ‘Bridgerton’: [imitating Scalise] ‘You guys, it’s like Jane Austen, however with excessive, tight man butt. That Shonda Rimes has acquired an actual future.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“However Scalise appears to need it each methods, as a result of he then criticized public well being outreach, saying, ‘You’re seeing some folks attempt to bully folks into doing issues as an alternative of simply encouraging them.’ OK, that’s an excellent level. Invite folks in, entice them, don’t name them out. So tonight, we at ‘The Late Present’ have up to date our prize for any unvaccinated Individuals who go get the shot. You’ll now win a lifetime provide of ‘life’ and ‘time.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“Inoculations have slowed dramatically, and fewer than half of the full U.S. inhabitants is absolutely vaccinated. So in the event you consider it like a pie, about half of the pie can be vaccinated whereas the opposite half wouldn’t be capable to style the pie as a result of they’ve Covid.” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“Hey, I need to say congrats to the Milwaukee Bucks for profitable their first N.B.A. championship in 50 years. Fifty years. That’s proper, they beat the Phoenix Suns, 105-98. However after all, Arizona has demanded a recount.” — JIMMY FALLON

“The sport was such a catastrophe for the Suns, Chris Paul needed to file a declare with State Farm to cowl his losses.” — ANTHONY ANDERSON, visitor host of “Jimmy Kimmel Reside,” referring to the Suns level guard

“The finals’ M.V.P. was Giannis Antetokounmpo, who’s from Greece. Yep, a Greek N.B.A. celebrity. He might be the primary individual to star in ‘House Jam’ and ‘Mamma Mia.’” — JIMMY FALLON

Anthony Anderson, the visitor host of “Jimmy Kimmel Reside,” despatched cameras to Hollywood Boulevard to seek out somebody who might spell “Giannis Antetokounmpo.”

Hannah Einbinder, star of the HBO Max collection “Hacks,” will sit down with Stephen Colbert on Thursday’s “Late Present.”



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